Esthers Birth Story

Around this time 5 years ago I was pregnant with our first child and hoping for a natural home birth. I developed high blood pressure then pre-eclampsia and ended up being in hospital for weeks, on tablets. Probably worst of all I had a c-section to deliver our son. What happened was the opposite end of the spectrum to what I'd hoped for. Our son was fine and physically I recovered well but I felt a failure. We were told it was best to wait 3 years before having another child following a c-section - at least that postponed facing the dilemma of wanting another child but being scared of pregnancy / birth.

For my second pregnancy I avoided 'the system' completely to begin with, all the time knowing I would have to do something eventually (other than hoping my husband, an electrician, could suddenly turn midwife!). In the April we engaged Kay Hardie. My first blood pressure check was such a milestone - when it was okay I was so relieved. Kay was fantastic. She came to our home, provided information / statistics (books / papers) which myself and my husband needed to make good decisions. Kay also gave me emotional support and made a real effort to understand the effect of my past experience and my needs.



My blood pressure did go up toward the end and I found myself in hospital briefly and on tablets again. My worst nightmare of going back into hospital turned out to be an experience that gave me peace about what happened before. One of the midwives talked me through my first pregnancy notes - something I had not been able to face before. Most people in 'the system' were fine. I felt rather bristly when told 'You are not allowed to have your baby at home' due to blood pressure and risk of scar rupture. Hmm 'not allowed'!

After one meeting with a registrar, who was rather negative, I found myself worrying whether or not I was doing the right thing aiming for a home birth - my confidence was being eroded. Kay has a wonderful way of restoring my confidence in birth, however and after a chat with her I was back on track.

In the early hours of May 31st things started. Kay came to our home at 10am. I used the birthing pool for a while; clinging onto my husband when contractions were really painful. In the preparation meetings, Kay advocated just going with what my body tells me during the birth. I kept reminding myself of that (not natural for someone who likes to be in control and plan for everything!).

Kay checked me and our baby regularly. She achieved just the right balance of being there but not being there. With no pressure to hurry things along, no internal examinations or medical interference I gave birth to our baby boy standing up in our bedroom that Saturday afternoon. Birth works!

Working with Kay I always felt 'this is how it is supposed to be'. One thing I had not predicted was the positive impact it had on my husband - he said how wonderful it was to have our son born straight into our home. I feel so blessed to have experienced a natural birth and can't praise Kay enough for the valuable, professional service she provides.